Wednesday, 23 November 2011

I did it....

I finally plucked up the courage to go to the dentists and get registration forms - I was shaking just going inside but that's the first bit done, now I just need to take the forms back and get an appointment.  Although she did say it could be a few weeks before they can get me in.

I decided to go to the docs as well, as I've been having constant headaches and ear pain and I wasn't sure if it was all to do with my teeth or something else.  Somehow my appointment with the doctor turned into a long discussion about anxiety and depression which she feels may be causing a lot of my problems (she thinks I might be teeth grinding in my sleep!).  I spent most of the appointment in tears (so embarrassing!) and I now have to fill in a depression questionnaire and go in and see her again next week.  I'm feeling a bit weird about all this... my family are very much the 'pull yourself together' type and I don't really know how to deal with any of this... I didn't think I was even going to say anything about it until I started typing... feeling a bit cross with myself and I don't know why... Gawd, sorry just ignore me, I don't half go on!

Here's a card, for those of you who came to see what I've made instead of reading a load of nonsense...

Just a simple one that I made for Morgan to take to the birthday party he went to the other day.  I've used Making Memories papers, nestie stars and a sentiment from a Cat's Pajamas set.  Buttons are from my stash and I added some glamour dust to the number 9.

Hopefully I'll be back with a more cheerful post tomorrow!


Debs M said...

don't be so hard on yourself, good luck with the appt next week x

Vicky said...

Well done sweetie & good for you discussing your depression....the problem with burying it is it comes back to bite you in the ass......big style believe me hun. I'm the kind where I think if I hide how I'm feeling then everyone will deal & cope with things better, I would rather be there for someone else than deal with myself. However that was my biggest mistake & I truly regret it hun so honestly good for you. If EVER you need to talk shug e-mail me anytime.......
Good luck with the dentist hun. Natalie grinds her teeth all the time lol, she's terrible lol.

Lotsa hugs Vicky xxx

Vicky said...

Oh cack I forgot to say your card is bleeding gorgeous hun love the & my babbling eh lol.

Lots more hugs Vicky xxx

Debs said...

Fab card Lisa - so clean and crisp :o)
You really need to be less hard on yourself - it's good to talk and the Dr's are there to listen - hope it goes well next week.
Massive pat on the back for getting the forms for the dentist - a step in the right direction.
Have a fab evening.
Debs xx

Littlebearcrafts said...

Gorgeous card!
Well done going to the Dentist and getting for forms. Good luck with everything else too.
Hugs, Clare x

Denise said...

Gorgeous card Lisa.
Huge congrats on registering with the Dentist - tooth pain is much worse than the actual cure!!! As for feeling cross about sharing what you discussed with the Doctor - don't you be so silly. Anxiety and depression are not fun and can cause all sorts of illnesses (been there, done that) and if you can't get it off your chest here on your blog with all your crafting buddies, well where can you. Take care of yourself sweetie and stop worrying. We don't care what you write about - LOL!!
Hugs and kisses
Denise xoxoxoxoxo

Faye said...

Actually, I came over to say flippin' well done on going to the dentist. The first step is always the hardest. As for the Doctor, go with it, only you will know if it feels right or not. If not, speak up. Just because things have always been (get on with it) doesn't mean it has to stay that way.
And, brilliant card.
Big hugs. xxx

Anonymous said...

Oh you poor thing Lisa, well done with the dentist, hope you get on ok.
Beautiful card, Sue x

Ali said...

Dont worry - I think most of us have had a similar experience to you and like you from the give yourself a kick up the jacksy and get on with it but dont be afraid to get help if you need it - only you know what will help - take care xxx p.s. love the card layout xxx

Carol said...

Well done on taking the first step Lisa but don't be so hard on yourself! Your card is fabulous, perfect for a 9 year old. Carol x

Sue said...

Hi ya hun
well done to you on both counts there is no shame in getting help when you need it hun. That is the hardest part the first step.
A fabulous card, great design, luv the sentiment, sue,x

Amanda said...

Hi Lisa, fab card love the colour scheme. I know how you feel about dentists so congrats on doing something about it. Talking about your problems is always hard to start with but you are amongst friends. Hugs Amanda xx

Jo said...

Hi Lisa
Your card is gorgeous and those papers are my fav ever for boys - think i'm on my 4th pad!!
Well done for dentist......i know just how you feel.As for Dr's..........well done again..........i'm plucking up courage to make an appointment for myself..............maybe tomorrow!
Take care
Jo x

Debs said...

gorgeous card hon and sending cyber hugs..the same happened to me and after a year ive just finished counselling.. and i also went to Docs for something completely different really has made a difference though so go with it and see how you feel ..Debs x

Jan Ltc said...

Great card Lisa. I hope you feel better soon. It's awful, feeling under the weather. Hugs xx Jan

Donna Mosley said...

Hi Lisa, firstly, well done on the denist front hun, I totally get how hard it is and going in is a huge step. I know we all have times when we feel like this and for some reason we just carry on. Then as you say, it is a huge shock/surprise when it all comes tumbling out. Just go with it love, it will do you the world of good. Sending huge hugs.

Great card BTW love the number 9.

Donna x

amanda stokes said...

Hi Lisa!
Glad to hear you finally plucked up the courage you'll feel so much better once you've had any needed done,i did :)
Sorry to hear you're not feeling great,i'm the same tho and had to go to doc's a few years ago with depression,just remember you're not alone and we're all here for you :)
FAB card too great for a boy!have those paper's in my stash somewhere...might have to dig them out ;)
sending you bug hugs

Sue said...

Well done on the dentist ive had to go today yikes !!!!!! but got away with just a check in and out in minutes whew and not to worry about the moan we all do it and if nobody is listening blog land is the best place out it never ceases to amaze me all the wonderful and supportive people there are out there so just keep moaning on we are all listening !!!!
Your card is fab love the papers you have used Luv Sue x

heidy said...

Hi Lisa,I so agree with the others ,take care hun!
BTW love this card!
XXX heidy

TAM said...

Firstly fabulous card - really like it.
Secondly well done on collecting the forms to register with the dentist - next step get them completed and make an appointment.
Lastly try and go with the flow with the doctors and don't be so hard on yourself. Often things creep up on us and we don't realise how they affect us. Feel free to sound off to us as much and as often as you like especially if it helps put things in perspective.
Take care

Unknown said...

Hi Lisa, what a lovely card! It's so clean and stylish - I really do wish I had your eye for colour, layout and style. Do you think I could nip over and nick your eyes for a few hours!!! ;-)

On the dentist / doc things - well done you for getting into the dentists, that is a very brave first step. The sooner you get seen, the sooner it will be over.

As for the Drs / depression - I'm also one for just 'getting on' with things and not asking for help, but there are times when we all have to realise that we do need some help and acknowledging that to the Dr (who actually listened and didn't fob you off) is the first step. I worked in the NHS (ok only as a sec) in children's mental health and the mental health workers are some of the kindest, most caring professionals you will ever come across. They listen so well and never judge - just the most brilliant place I've ever been - so if the Dr ends up sending you to see someone - go, please it will really help.

Sorry I've waffled on too! I hope things get better for you soon. I know you don't know me from Adam, but if you ever feel like just talking, email me - I can do listening as well as waffle!!!

Best wishes,

Doreen said...

Your card is gorgeous Lisa, good luck with the

Vicky said...

Oh Lisa well done hun...I'm so proud you have finally got the forms and hopefully your appointment will come thro' soon sweetie...

Onto the next bit...I will not ramble cos' loads of peeps had said it already...just go with it hun and I promise the Doc's are there to help you... :o)

sending big hugs Vicky xx

Kim Dellow said...

Oh you did a brilliant job and I'm not just talking about the gorgeous make! Talking to someone about depression is so very hard, yep another one who can put her hand up and say I've been there too.
So relax, try not to be hard on yourself and take each day as it comes one step at a time :) and don't let other people's fear of facing their problems put you off. 'Pulling yourself together' is not always the healthiest or helpful of attitudes! I know 'coz it was my attitude for years and it didn't do me any good at all. LOL! Kim

Unknown said...

HI Lisa, First of all fabulous card love the papers and fab sentiment and glittery No 9 perfect male card.

Secondly well done on going to the dentist, hope you can get an appointment soon and get your tooth sorted.

As for the Doctors, I really relate to you sweetie - I have been going through the exact same things, constant headaches, earaches even down into my shoulder. I have also been very short tempered with most people especially the kids and have trouble sleeping too. I have been treated for depression before and had to give up work due to it a few years back. Mine has all come back due to having to close the shop and everything related to that. Things sometimes get a little bit too much and before you know it it can feel very overwhelming. All I can say to you is that if you can try and accept that its not you and you actually have an illness that CAN be treated and talk to people you will make it through and come through it a much stronger person. You will find that if you can talk to your family and explain how you feel they will understand and give you the support you need. Dont be afraid to talk to your doctor and make sure you fill that questionnaire out truefully!!.
Best of luck and big hugs
Lyndsey xx

Mau xx said...

Hi Lisa, I am just sending you Mega Huge Hugs, Good for you going to the Dentist :))
Just talk sweetie, it's a good healer of most things. xx
Love your card, the colours are fab and love the star xx

Teresa said...

Hello Lisa,
Well done you for sorting your appts, I am just as afraid of the dentist as you are, you're not alone lol.
As for the whole doctors thing I think you need to chat about these things it does help to share and I too have fallen apart in the docs before so you're not the first to do that either. You've taken a huge step today, well done you and hope you start to feel better soon, take care, hugs Teresa xx

Vicky Hayes said...

Oh Lisa, you poor thing - things are not going well for you at all. First of all the 'pull yourself together' approach is NOT the way to go! Secondly being in constant pain causes symptoms of depression so remove that and you may find yourself feeling miraculously better. I had a problem with a root canal filling... abcesses etc for over a year and became really ill and depressed. Of course it might not be anything to do with that but do get it checked out won't you and don't be too proud to ask for day-today help either.
A huge bloggy hug from me. Vicky x

Jackie said...

Lisa, talking about it is half the battle. Get it out of your system. Well done on taking the first steps to both the dentist and the doctors.
Fabulous card :o)
Jackie xx

Helen said...

I think everyone has said what I wanted to, Lisa but I did just want to say that I had problems with grinding my teeth at the end of last year - very similar symptoms to the ones you described. My dentist made me a 'mouth guard' which just fits over my teeth - doesn't sound great but it really helped and lessened the earache/headaches a lot.

Take care of yourself
Helen x

Craftdee said...

Hi Lisa, I'm sure your previous comments cover what I have to say, but I'll say it anyway - I'm like that :-) As a sufferer of depression for most of my adult life the first thing I have to say is - would you be embarrassed about being a diabetic? NO, clinical depression is a condition just the same, so no embarrassment! (and seriously, do you think the docs not "been there" before) Secondly, acknowledgement and treatment of depression has come such a long way, just the social acceptance of it as a medical condition has helped me immeasurably in the last few years to be in control of it...which feels "cured" because of its very nature. Waffling now, anyway I just wanted to ensure you that you're "no orphan" IF it is depression and that it's very manageable... :-) Donna

Lorraine said...

First off - love the design & papers of your birthday card! As for the dentist - yay, good for you - that was a major step! Maybe your tooth pain is causing you to be anxious and feel depressed/stressed. As for the doctor - no need to feel embarassed - anxiety and depression are pretty common - I'm sure most people experience at one time or another. Or some are prone to it - but talking & meds help. These are real conditions. People shouldn't feel embarassed or any less of a person for seeking help to be the best they can be! oops, sorry for rambling on.

Christine aka blankiefinder said...

It sounds like you had quite the day, Lisa! The first step is always the hardest.

I grind my teeth too... so bad that I actually cracked a filling and had to get a root canal last spring :( It's been a very long fall here it feels like, so I can't imagine how I'm going to make it through our typical cold and dark winter this year!

Wonderful card, love the star nesties on it!

debby4000 said...

Love your card Lisa and fab sentiment.
Good job with sorting out a dentist.
Maybe now the word depression is out in the open, things will get better for you.
Sending some big hugs.

Michelle said...

Your card is absolutely gorgeous, Lisa! I love it!

Good on you for registering with the dentist. I hope the appointment comes up sooner than later.

It sounds as though you have a great doctor, someone who is looking after YOU and not just your symptoms. You're probably feeling cranky with yourself because you opened up the door and shared more about yourself than you are normally comfortable with. I know all about that! I also know all about the "pull yourself together" and "keep on smiling on the outside" approach to life. It doesn't really work in the long-run. I'm glad you shared with us here, and I'm doubly glad you shared with your doctor. By the other comments, I can see there are lots of us who suffer depression and anxiety at times! I can also see that you will receive heaps of support amongst your crafty friends. :-)

Good luck with the appointments. Hugs to you. xx

Squirrel x said...

Oh babes, you poor little sausage. I think many of us have been there and got the t-shirt. The best advice I can give is to take the help that doc is offering. If you want to talk about it you can always give me a call. Big hugs, Sxx

Dotty Jo said...

Oh your poor thing... been there myself and I can sympathise BIG time. Well done you on making all these moves towards getting help - best thing you could have done. We've all had a weep at the Doctors from time to time so don't worry about it. Try and find something nice to do each day that makes you happy, because as they say on that advert 'you're worth it'. Big cyber hugs your way, Jo x

coops said...

aw well done hun on getting your name on the books at the doctors, you will be much better once you`ve been and try not to be too hard on yourself about the doctors,we all go throught these spells where the tears flow and its good to talk about things,must admit though i do tend to keep things to myself and i know i shouldn`t.
i hope all goes well when you go back to the docs next week.
love your card, the design is fantastic and stunning papers ;D

xx coops xx

♥Gemma♥ said...

First of all sweetie...your card is fantastic but then again they always are!!

Secondly sweetie...well done for taking the step to go to your doctors but i do know where you are coming from sweetie & i also tend to keep things to myself because i feel like im bothering people & always put a front on i suppose so people think everything is well...anyhoo wont go on any more but if ever you need to talk, scream or shout just email sweetie!!
hugs and xxx

rosie said...

fab card amazing colours.
well done on going to the dentists and its scary but its well worth it. I was terrified but had to go as I had severe abcess and luckily found a very understanding dentist.
they are more used to people being scared or nervous and hopefully you will get an understanding dentist at the practise when you go.
as for the doctors - another well done. you have made the first step and don't ever ever feel embarrassed to cry. doctors deal with emotions every single day and will totally understand how you feel.
if you feel you can't talk to your family then don't. talk to us. as others have said a lot of us have gone through exactly what you are going through now. I've been there. I was on tablets, felt so much better for taking them. sadly a lot of families are the "pull yourself together" type and its only because they don't know how to deal with what you are going through or what to say to you.
regardless of whether we meet face to face us crafters are family. we support each other through thick and thin, good times and bad, lost mojo or stamps or just a damn good moan we are all here for you and for each other. don't ever feel like you have to deal with this alone. anytime you need help one of us (or more) will be here with big shoulders and big ears to listen, advise and just be there for you.
doesn't matter whether you think "oh it doesn't matter!" it does and it will to us.
we love you Lisa. you are an amazing person and we are here for you anytime x

Christine L said...

HI Sweetie... What a fabulous FUN card!
And yes, I'm another that's been there, done that, got the t shirt etc... and am still struggling with it at times. Anytime you want to email me, please do - it's always good to know you're not the only one and that you CANNOT pull yourself together... and anyone that says that has not suffered true anxiety. It will go in time of it's own accord, all you can do is know that it will. And it can cause so many physical symptoms - I've had the same tooth probs, headaches etc. Last bit of advice, in the words of a fab card I once saw... 'when it's raining, learn to dance in the puddles...!' And there are some, I promise!
Big Hugs
Christine x

Jenny said...

Oh Lisa, I have nothing new to add to all those wonderful supportive comments and I really think you've made the right first move with both doctor and dentist. As Mum's we are expected to 'deal with it' but sometimes we need open up and talk about our feelings however hard or un-natural it is for us to do so :)

You sure have a wonderful group of crafting friends to give you support and lend an ear :)

Hugs to you and hope you follow up that appointment.
Jenny x

Joey said...

WOW Lisa Hunny, have been there got the t-shirt and visiting there again at the moment, I have the same family lol, mine is down to many different factors, trouble is I dont like to cast blame or place it down to anyone, and I hate myself for being like it. it was the hardest thing to go to the doctor, we have recently changed doctors cos of the move, so it made it worse,but as I have been told thats the hardest step over with,I wasnt sure whether to talk or not that day but I did, I think I worry too much having had postnatal depression after my Niall, dont want to be labelled again by the doctors. I too have a questionnaire sitting there to do and a blood test form, bit like the dentist for blood tests for me lol. I also Grind my teeth whilst asleep, the dentist asked I said "err I dunno" but I find myself grinding all the time now, without realising until I am doing it, drives me mad! Hope things pick up for you hun. You know we are all here to support you, lots of love Joey xxx

Anonymous said...

Well done for going to the dentist and as for the doctors I am another who totally understands! Someone very close to me has been through it and come out the other side smiling. Just remember you are never alone! Love your card too!
Helen x

Michelle Short said...

Hi Lisa,

Fab card, love the paper and those cute buttons.

Well done on your first step to the dentist. I know how you feel, I didn't go for almost ten years cos I was petrified and then when I registered and got an appointment it was scary but I got through it and they were really nice. Thankfully my teeth wren't bad at all so I didn't have to have any work done!

As for the just get through it approach, I completely know what you mean too, I have been doing it for months at work when I am really struggling with my health and mentally. It was obviously something you needed to speak to your doctor about and well done you for doing it, it takes a lot of courage. Wishing you all the best and if there is anything I can ever do please just let me know,

Best wishes xxx